George Santos Elected Speaker of House in Startling Upset for McCarthy (satire) Trump’s endorsement of controversial Queens congressman as a “trustworthy billionaire” wins 218 GOP votes

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Washington DC, January 6, 2023:  Kevin McCarthy has lost the House leadership battle to incoming New York freshman congressman George Santos. 

“Billionaire George has proven that he’s got what it takes to lead a Republican majority,” proclaimed former President Donald Trump, in a surprise New Year’s Day push that resulted in 218 votes for Santos.

“Unlike faker Ron DeSanctimonious,” Trump declared, “George is a real Latino leader for our times. He’s a perfect, loyal, Republican, a true-believing Christian, and a hero of 9-11, where his mother, a Jewish holocaust survivor, died tragically, despite George rushing into the burning building and saving dozens of other people from certain death.”

Congress Member Marjorie Greene of Georgia worked all night New Year’s eve making visiting House members at parties and in their homes rounding up votes with an AR-15 assault rifle and electric prod. She denied rumors that she is held the families of a number of legislators hostage until they had voted for Santos. 

“To kill socialism, we need party unity this week, not partying hedonists buying dildos at CVS,” Greene tweeted. “George is a true rags to riches success story, making a billion dollars on Wall Street and giving half of it away to charity before deciding to devote his career to saving our country from Communists, pedos & liars!”

Colorado Congress Member Lauren Boebert cast her vote for Santos with the comment, “Unlike RINO McCarthy, we can all trust George. Trust, integrity and truthiness is a rare commodity in Washington these days.”

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Jonathan Greenberg

Jonathan Greenberg is the editor and publisher of the award winning Sonoma Independent, which he founded to serve the public interest with insight, solutions and advocacy. He is also founder and CEO of ProgressiveSource.com, a 17 year old public interest digital advocacy company that builds public awareness of solutions that serve the common good. Progressive Source owns the Sonoma Independent and the Maui Independent. Jonathan is the also the founder of the Climate Solutions Advocacy Institute (CSAI) and its parent educational nonprofit, Informing to Empower. He created the non-profit democratizing media Candidates Video Debate platform, as well as the InformYourVote.org system. Through CSAI, he co-authored and directed the creation of California's Renewable Energy Acceleration Law ballot initiative. Jonathan was a Web 1.0 pioneer. In 1996 he started Gist Communications, a disruptive new media company that competed successfully with News Corp’s TV Guide Online. In 1997, Gist was one of just 14 websites in the world to be named a winner of the First Annual Webby Awards in San Francisco. Following Gist and the 9-11 attacks on the World Trade Center, Jonathan served, in 2002 and 2003, as Policy Director for the New York City Council’s Select Committee on Lower Manhattan Redevelopment, where he directed media and public policy campaigns and was the city council’s lead analyst for federal relief programs. Simultaneous with his public interest work, Jonathan has been an investigative financial journalist with 40 years of experience with national publications, including Forbes, The Washington Post, The New York Times, New York, Town & Country. Mother Jones and The New Republic. During the past five years, Jonathan wrote four of the most widely-read exposes in the Washington Post about Donald Trump. Jonathan has known Trump longer than any journalist writing today. He was head of research for the first Forbes 400 when Trump conned him into putting him on the list. The notorious phone calls Trump taped pretending to be John Barron was the subject of monologues on Colbert, the Daily Show and Seth Meyers. Jonathan has appeared live on a dozen major news shows, including on CNN with Chris Cuomo, Erin Burnett and Don Lemon, on MSNBC with Ari Berber and Ali Velshi, and NPR's On the Media. He is a graduate of Yale Law School's Masters Degree in Law fellowship program. A fuller bio and links to Jonathan's work can be found at JonathanGreenberg.com.

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